I just stumbled on this website called Partners in Care. What a fabulous idea! Check out the site to get some ideas for what you can do. Don't wait for this agency to come to your area. We can already offer our services to those who would surely appreciate a break, no matter how small. A friend used to walk with Alan while I ran ahead. That was the only 20 minutes I had to myself all week. Imagine......Read more in my memoir Living on the Verge of Insanity
If you aren't close by you can send a nice Hug a Caregiver gift.
Showing posts with label memoir. Show all posts
Showing posts with label memoir. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 01, 2009
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
It ain't Oprah but hey.....
I wanted to let everyone know about a bunch of stuff coming up related to my book.
1) I'll be on the TV show Senior Forum which airs on 5/13 @ 10 a.m. Cablevision. Channel 74.
It's the Yorktown schedule.
2) I'll be speaking for AARP at the Yorktown Senior Services
1 p.m. Wednesday 5/13.
Yorktown Nutrition Center
1974 Commerce Street
Yorktown, New York 10598
3) I'm speaking this Sunday 4/26 at 2:30 p.m. room B at the Tarrytown Marriot.
4) Also NYC book signing is this Saturday in Tribeca. Let me know if you can be there.
Here's the info.:
"Acclaimed author of “Living on the Verge of Insanity: Loving lessons Learned From My Sweetie's Early-onset Alzheimer's Disease - A Caregiver's Memoir” will be making a rare personal appearance and conducting a book-signing along with a special movie screening at Manhattan’s trendy Dylan Prime Restaurant at 62 Laight Street (just south of Canal Street) on April 25th from 2:00 pm to 5:00 pm. The screening will be Andrew Jenks, Room 335 a heartwarming documentary about a 19 year old college student who moves into an assisted living home for the summer.The movie will be followed by the book signing party.
This very special event will be taking place during the internationally famous Tribeca Film Festival, and will offer hor d’oeurves and a cash bar. Because of the anticipated attendance at this gathering, guests should register in advance either by email to sotmary@gmail.com, or by telephone message at 917-273-1308 as soon as possible. Although there is no admission fee, reservations are required. There will be a suggested donation of $5 for the movie screening."
1) I'll be on the TV show Senior Forum which airs on 5/13 @ 10 a.m. Cablevision. Channel 74.
It's the Yorktown schedule.
2) I'll be speaking for AARP at the Yorktown Senior Services
1 p.m. Wednesday 5/13.
Yorktown Nutrition Center
1974 Commerce Street
Yorktown, New York 10598
3) I'm speaking this Sunday 4/26 at 2:30 p.m. room B at the Tarrytown Marriot.
4) Also NYC book signing is this Saturday in Tribeca. Let me know if you can be there.
Here's the info.:
"Acclaimed author of “Living on the Verge of Insanity: Loving lessons Learned From My Sweetie's Early-onset Alzheimer's Disease - A Caregiver's Memoir” will be making a rare personal appearance and conducting a book-signing along with a special movie screening at Manhattan’s trendy Dylan Prime Restaurant at 62 Laight Street (just south of Canal Street) on April 25th from 2:00 pm to 5:00 pm. The screening will be Andrew Jenks, Room 335 a heartwarming documentary about a 19 year old college student who moves into an assisted living home for the summer.The movie will be followed by the book signing party.
This very special event will be taking place during the internationally famous Tribeca Film Festival, and will offer hor d’oeurves and a cash bar. Because of the anticipated attendance at this gathering, guests should register in advance either by email to sotmary@gmail.com, or by telephone message at 917-273-1308 as soon as possible. Although there is no admission fee, reservations are required. There will be a suggested donation of $5 for the movie screening."
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
#21 Loving lessons from a Caregiver
I learned that complete strangers can have more patience because this isn't their relative or loved one and they haven't had months or years of coping with troubling behaviors. Caregivers are often at their wits end.
In Living on the Verge of Insanity, my recently released memoir, I describe the day care centers and nursing home staff and how they knew how to talk to Alan and keep him engaged all day until my return. I was amazed at their kindness and followed their lead in many situations. Seeing him through their eyes as a sweet, loving man helped me continue on with my efforts in a loving, open hearted way.
In Living on the Verge of Insanity, my recently released memoir, I describe the day care centers and nursing home staff and how they knew how to talk to Alan and keep him engaged all day until my return. I was amazed at their kindness and followed their lead in many situations. Seeing him through their eyes as a sweet, loving man helped me continue on with my efforts in a loving, open hearted way.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
#8 Loving lessons from a Caregiver
As a caregiver for my long time partner with dementia, I learned that power needs to be watched carefully and negative power needs to be controlled.
There is much trust of the caregiver by the loved one and it is important to honor it as trust. Wanting to be proud of my role as caregiver ultimately motivated me to soften and support Alan's dignity to the very end. This, mind you, was after living through some bumpy times.
I first had to experience the dark places in myself - my impatience, my lack of skill, and my exhaustion - to know I was a full human being with all that brings. But to grow from the experience I needed to find ways to work myself back into being a loving trusted caregiver and partner.
These important issues come in all shapes and sizes and I share lots of stories about how I was able to make the shift to a softer, more open hearted place in my memoir Living on the Verge of Insanity.
There is much trust of the caregiver by the loved one and it is important to honor it as trust. Wanting to be proud of my role as caregiver ultimately motivated me to soften and support Alan's dignity to the very end. This, mind you, was after living through some bumpy times.
I first had to experience the dark places in myself - my impatience, my lack of skill, and my exhaustion - to know I was a full human being with all that brings. But to grow from the experience I needed to find ways to work myself back into being a loving trusted caregiver and partner.
These important issues come in all shapes and sizes and I share lots of stories about how I was able to make the shift to a softer, more open hearted place in my memoir Living on the Verge of Insanity.
Friday, February 13, 2009
#2 Loving Lessons from a caregiver
During my eight years of caregiving I learned deeply how life is here to be lived, beyond memories, beyond reason, beyond hopes, beyond change, beyond judgments and beyond loss.
Engagement is the most important thing to me now, like being involved with my Salsa dancing, Zumba, jazz, triathlons, kickboxing, Rotary and growing my businesses. It's not about judging how good I am at any of them but rather how deeply committed I am to experiencing my chosen interests.
In Living on the Verge of Insanity I discuss how I was able to live this way and care for Alan even if it meant arranging to bring him to everything I was engaged in.
Engagement is the most important thing to me now, like being involved with my Salsa dancing, Zumba, jazz, triathlons, kickboxing, Rotary and growing my businesses. It's not about judging how good I am at any of them but rather how deeply committed I am to experiencing my chosen interests.
In Living on the Verge of Insanity I discuss how I was able to live this way and care for Alan even if it meant arranging to bring him to everything I was engaged in.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
#1 Loving Lessons from a caregiver
I was able to narrow down to 30 the loving lessons that I discuss in my memoir "Living on the Verge of Insanity". My dear readers will get to learn what these lessons are in installments over the next couple of months.
Please let caregivers know that I am doing this so they can borrow my lessons to fortify themselves. Hopefully they'll better be able to keep their hearts open while avoiding the almost inevitable burnout we all feel.
Lesson One
1) I learned to draw on all my talents and skills in other areas of my life and apply them to my caregiving.
In the book I describe how I used my Life Coaching skills to find different perspectives on what was happening and my Montessori teaching skills to invent appropriate activities for Alan's skill levels.
a) From my Life Coaching I used metaphor: Like the times when he would call to me over and over to stay in touch. I used the metaphor of birds calling to each other tweeting, "I'm here, you're there". It made the repetition bearable for me since I am a bird person and have my African Grey Charlie on my lap as I type this.
b) The advice out there is to keep activities manageable to avoid stress for someone with Alzheimer's. I describe how Alan's laundry skills changed over time from doing the whole load to years later being limited to carrying things upstairs for me to fold. I would feel content in knowing I was able to use my skills as a Montessori teacher to help to keep him busy, happy and proud of his accomplishments with his dignity intact.
Stay tuned for lesson #2 where I talk about engaging deeply in my life while caregiving for Alan as a way to flourish and learn from my experiences.
Please let caregivers know that I am doing this so they can borrow my lessons to fortify themselves. Hopefully they'll better be able to keep their hearts open while avoiding the almost inevitable burnout we all feel.
Lesson One
1) I learned to draw on all my talents and skills in other areas of my life and apply them to my caregiving.
In the book I describe how I used my Life Coaching skills to find different perspectives on what was happening and my Montessori teaching skills to invent appropriate activities for Alan's skill levels.
a) From my Life Coaching I used metaphor: Like the times when he would call to me over and over to stay in touch. I used the metaphor of birds calling to each other tweeting, "I'm here, you're there". It made the repetition bearable for me since I am a bird person and have my African Grey Charlie on my lap as I type this.
b) The advice out there is to keep activities manageable to avoid stress for someone with Alzheimer's. I describe how Alan's laundry skills changed over time from doing the whole load to years later being limited to carrying things upstairs for me to fold. I would feel content in knowing I was able to use my skills as a Montessori teacher to help to keep him busy, happy and proud of his accomplishments with his dignity intact.
Stay tuned for lesson #2 where I talk about engaging deeply in my life while caregiving for Alan as a way to flourish and learn from my experiences.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
My new book is in pre-release
Please forward this information to any caregivers you may know. Thanks.
In case you missed the email announcement I decided to post this here. Sorry for the duplication......
My book Living On the Verge of Insanity will be coming out soon. Here's the description. The printer is shipping them so all I need is your address sent to me at sotmary@gmail.com. I'm giving 30% off for pre-release orders that will get to you by 3/1/09.
With so many self help books on the market it's nice to have a behind the scenes look at what goes on in the long term care of a loved one with Early Onset Alzheimer's Disease. Whether you are caring for an aging parent, a troubled child or a spouse with emotional or health problems, there are many things to consider and lessons to learn during these stress-filled times. Living On the Verge of Insanity follows Christine and Alan's journey to discover how she learned that care giving can be a loving, enriching time in life but often it gets derailed. Find out how one caregiver learned to stayed on track and reached deep inside herself to find untapped resources and skills she never knew she had.
What readers are saying:
"…an easy read and a tender love story of a caring person."
Jean Hampsas, the caregiver for her husband
"The book is an intimate look into a partnership and truly serves as a practical and non-judgemental guide which I feel will help readers who are already well into (or have even finished) their own journeys to reflect and realize their own positive insights . It was an honor to review this beautiful elucidation of Chris and Alan's deeply moving experiences together and it brought to mind many pleasant memories of my dear mother. Thank you both for this opportunity."
Felicia Gironda, former caregiver and Associate Professor at Touro College, specializing in normal and abnormal aging
"I’ve known Christine Sotmary for over fifty years. We played together when we were children and, separately, we have known tragedy and pain. Reading her story of her journey and of the strengths she developed and discovered that she had has helped me understand better the woman she has become and the way that a strong and determined person can grow through struggle and pain. This is a book that has to be read more than once."
Leonard Marks, caregiver for his wife and Christine's childhood friend
"Thank you for the pleasure and privilege of reading your manuscript Living on the Verge of Insanity. I found it to be a most moving love story and an incredibly poignant honoring of your life partner.
Your careful descriptions of your relationship with Alan, before, during and after his illness, are truly informative to anyone who has ever been in a relationship at all, not just people who have been involved in the care of an ill loved one. Your depiction of the progression of the illness itself is a tribute to the human spirit's transcendence of bodily illness and is therefore inspirational to all, since we are all vulnerable to our own eventual physical decline.
I am left with the impression of your being an extraordinary individual, and I thank you for having confirmed my long held conviction that the arts are powerfully healing forces and that ongoing involvement in an art form, over the course of one's life, can usher us into the final phase with grace and dignity.
Thank you again for allowing me to share this with you!"
Judith Luongo, M.P.S., A.T.R.
About the author
Christine Sotmary, M.S., L.Ac, CPC is a certified Life Coach specializing in coaching caregivers to rediscover joy, find resources and hold on to love they have for themselves and others during these trying times. Go to www.gotcoaching.com for more information.
She also is a powerful speaker on the many loving lessons that she learned during her 8-year journey of caring for her sweetie. Find more information on her talk 30 Loving Lessons for Full Hearts: fortifying caregivers by going to www.livingontheverge.com
Christine Sotmary, M.S., L.Ac. CPC
Author
Living On the Verge of Insanity: Loving lessons learned from my sweetie’s early-onset Alzheimer’s disease
ISBN: 978-0-692-00022-9
sotmary@gmail.com
917-273-1308
"In addition to relieving patient suffering, research is needed to help reduce the enormous economic and social burdens posed by chronic diseases such as osteoporosis, arthritis, diabetes, Parkinson's and Alzheimer's diseases, cancer, heart disease, and stroke."
Ike Skelton
In case you missed the email announcement I decided to post this here. Sorry for the duplication......
My book Living On the Verge of Insanity will be coming out soon. Here's the description. The printer is shipping them so all I need is your address sent to me at sotmary@gmail.com. I'm giving 30% off for pre-release orders that will get to you by 3/1/09.
With so many self help books on the market it's nice to have a behind the scenes look at what goes on in the long term care of a loved one with Early Onset Alzheimer's Disease. Whether you are caring for an aging parent, a troubled child or a spouse with emotional or health problems, there are many things to consider and lessons to learn during these stress-filled times. Living On the Verge of Insanity follows Christine and Alan's journey to discover how she learned that care giving can be a loving, enriching time in life but often it gets derailed. Find out how one caregiver learned to stayed on track and reached deep inside herself to find untapped resources and skills she never knew she had.
What readers are saying:
"…an easy read and a tender love story of a caring person."
Jean Hampsas, the caregiver for her husband
"The book is an intimate look into a partnership and truly serves as a practical and non-judgemental guide which I feel will help readers who are already well into (or have even finished) their own journeys to reflect and realize their own positive insights . It was an honor to review this beautiful elucidation of Chris and Alan's deeply moving experiences together and it brought to mind many pleasant memories of my dear mother. Thank you both for this opportunity."
Felicia Gironda, former caregiver and Associate Professor at Touro College, specializing in normal and abnormal aging
"I’ve known Christine Sotmary for over fifty years. We played together when we were children and, separately, we have known tragedy and pain. Reading her story of her journey and of the strengths she developed and discovered that she had has helped me understand better the woman she has become and the way that a strong and determined person can grow through struggle and pain. This is a book that has to be read more than once."
Leonard Marks, caregiver for his wife and Christine's childhood friend
"Thank you for the pleasure and privilege of reading your manuscript Living on the Verge of Insanity. I found it to be a most moving love story and an incredibly poignant honoring of your life partner.
Your careful descriptions of your relationship with Alan, before, during and after his illness, are truly informative to anyone who has ever been in a relationship at all, not just people who have been involved in the care of an ill loved one. Your depiction of the progression of the illness itself is a tribute to the human spirit's transcendence of bodily illness and is therefore inspirational to all, since we are all vulnerable to our own eventual physical decline.
I am left with the impression of your being an extraordinary individual, and I thank you for having confirmed my long held conviction that the arts are powerfully healing forces and that ongoing involvement in an art form, over the course of one's life, can usher us into the final phase with grace and dignity.
Thank you again for allowing me to share this with you!"
Judith Luongo, M.P.S., A.T.R.
About the author
Christine Sotmary, M.S., L.Ac, CPC is a certified Life Coach specializing in coaching caregivers to rediscover joy, find resources and hold on to love they have for themselves and others during these trying times. Go to www.gotcoaching.com for more information.
She also is a powerful speaker on the many loving lessons that she learned during her 8-year journey of caring for her sweetie. Find more information on her talk 30 Loving Lessons for Full Hearts: fortifying caregivers by going to www.livingontheverge.com
Christine Sotmary, M.S., L.Ac. CPC
Author
Living On the Verge of Insanity: Loving lessons learned from my sweetie’s early-onset Alzheimer’s disease
ISBN: 978-0-692-00022-9
sotmary@gmail.com
917-273-1308
"In addition to relieving patient suffering, research is needed to help reduce the enormous economic and social burdens posed by chronic diseases such as osteoporosis, arthritis, diabetes, Parkinson's and Alzheimer's diseases, cancer, heart disease, and stroke."
Ike Skelton
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